Shark Bytes

Kirk Cameron or Mike Seever was such a hottie! He was the object of many a fantasy for me during the years that this show was on the air! I used to fantasize about him coming to live with me and sharing a room! And in my fantasy, many times Christopher Knight or Peter Brady from the Brady Bunch would also move in with us and we would be sharing a room just like the Brady brothers did! Only this time with benefits! What a great fantasy! Whoohoo!

They called him B**** because his last name was Stabone and when Mike met him on the first day of school he gave him the nickname, his fist name was Dicky or something that Mike didn't like.

This show is nothing but a painful memory to me. I had to suffer through it weekly because of my bratty little sister who thought it was the coolest TV show ever. It was gawdawful drivel that should never have been allowed to be broadcast in the first place.

The writing was horrific. The acting was worse. Alan Thicke should never, ever have been on television in any way, shape or form. Kirk Cameron is possibly one of the most pompous, irritating jerks ever -- and when he found religion, it only made him worse. The other cast members were only slightly less horrible. None of them could act, including Leonardo (one of the most over-rated actors in Hollywood today).

This show actually broke my suck-o-meter when I was trying to get a reading to include here. Drivel, drivel, drivel.

I can't for the life of me understand why ABC hedged its bets on Alan Thicke in the mid-80's. He should have stuck to writing bizarre TV theme shows.

Aside from the tripe that was called Growing Pains (the only real pain to me was remembering why all the actors on the show bellered their lines at the top of their lungs - didn't the stage mikes work?), Thicke hosted that god-awful talk show, Thicke of the Night.

He also hosted some Saturday morning animal game show. I remember JM J. Bullock (of Too Close for Comfort fame) was a frequent guest, and Thicke could never get his name right.

Great show and the theme song is one of the best of all 80s or 90s shows. I find it hard to believe that the character of Mike Seaver would sleep with a shirt on.

Why on earth does EVERYONE think Kirk Cameron was hot??

He wasn't THAT great. Somewhat cute, yes, but many young guys are cute to certain degree. Kirk was short, skinny, and awkward-looking, in my opinion. Nowhere near as attractive as other teen idols such as, say, Mark-Paul Gosselaar from Saved By The Bell.

Everyone seems to be in agreement that Growing Pains JTSed when Chrissy was born and seemed to go from infant to a 5 year old in 2 years. What the hell was up with that? she was a brat and a useless character anyway. By then the show was getting old anyway, the characters were too old and poor Tracey Gold left because she had an eating disorder. The Leo Dicaprio character was useless as well, they take in a homeless character? As if! Who does that? It's a nice gesture, but please.

Anyone remember when Brad Pitt was Carol's boyfriend? That was funny as well as Matthew Perry dying after he drove drunk. The 1990 Halloween episode is my favorite and anyone remember when Mike and "B" (slang name for what happens to a male when he gets excited,funny name BTW,one question.....why did they call him "B"? I know the obvious answer but it seemed odd for such a family oriented show) are invited to a party and the partygoers are going into the bathroom to snort Cocaine. I remember "B" telling Mr Seaver at the end that he "didn't go to the bathroom" as in he didn't do the cocaine. I just remember not knowing why EVERYONE was going to the bathroom, I just assumed everyone went to the bathroom together and that freaked me out. Hey, I was only 5, I had no concept of drugs. Of course that was one PSA to say no to drugs, give me a break.

I also hated when Mike would make fun of Carol's weight. No wonder the poor girl was anorexic, she was in NO way fat. Kirk Cameron also got all high and mighty and got that Playboy girl kicked off the show, poor girl. Although I will say Kirk was hot, especially in the early days, I can see why he was a heartthrob. I'm all for freedom of religion, but come on, the girl is just trying to work. I also think Joanna Kearns and Alan Thicke had a good chemistry. Anyways GP JTsed when Chrissy was born.

Oh, and before anyone calls me on this, I just remembered that Carol is actually the daughter, and I should have been picking on Maggie for her poor simulated childbirth scene.

Growing Pains was alternately amusing and lame, but the show jumped with the birth of Chrissy. Carol had the perfect opportunity to scream her head off at Jason for getting her in that painful predicament (even though she didn't really mean it), and all she did was scold him about always leaving the toilet seat up or something dumb like that. Next here's Carol looking totally refreshed, cradling another precious little sitcom-destroyer.

this show was great. It's your everyday, typical family. who wants to to see perfect families? it wouldn't be any good if they were perfect. Rapidly aging the kid is kinda annoying though. "lily" from step by step, "emily" from yes dear, etc.

When did it jump? Let me give the list:

1) TOO MUCH CANNED LAUGHTER.

This show was just not funny. If all you hear is canned laughter - when it is shot in front of a live audience anyhow. If the writers have to rely on phony chuckles to get through a show - bad news...


2) KIRK CAMERON.

The show I THOUGHT was supposed to be about a psychiatrist and his family. it turned out to be about the moron Kirk Cameron since the producers noted teen girls were getting the hot & sweaties over this untalented actor - so they in turned the show into being primarily about him. Kirk was HORRIBLE. He wasn't funny, he was juvenile in EVERY thing he did, reminded me too much of too many other dopey dunces (all males - coincidence?) on other TV shows. All these comedies had their brain, their hottie, the dad, some retard that got all the attention (insert Kirk Cameron), some kid that was overlooked – and in this case, the retard had an even dopier friend to take some of the focus on Kirk and just how BAD he was. One can’t help but feel bad for Chekov’s son, Andrew Koenig who played “B0ner”. You know you are in trouble if your character is named for a rather rigid part of a pubescent boy’s life.

Kirk further sunk the show when he turned into some holy roller. Toward the end, I remember hearing (I had a cousin that was an intern on the set) about how his new-found religious beliefs (and holier-than-thou attitude) was causing problems on the set. Kirk disagreed with practically everything, threatening to walk off the set (and the show) if they didn't rewrite scripts to remove innuendos, anything remotely risqué. The skirts (writers) wanted to milk the “Growing Pains” cow as long as they could, so they couldn’t risk p!ssing off the “star”, nor demonstrate that they had a pair, so they gave in, took the ‘suggestions’ of the “star” and made the show even UN-funnier than ever. The show went downhill fast after Kirk was elevated to the unofficial role of producer, censor, and script supervisor. Example: look how fast Kirk ushered off Julie McCullough, who could actually act – as soon as his highness discovered that she had some t0pless (or some other innocuous) shots of her appear in public. Julie was a memory fast (although I have inside information that Kirk was actually quite smidgeon with her – until of course her t0pless pictures could take a little shine off his ego). Not saying religion is bad, but it normally doesn’t wash in TV shows (i.e. “just the ten of us”)


3) ENTER CHELSEA NOBLE

If Kirk wasn’t already terrible and enough of a liability for the show – enter his future wife Chelsea Noble. Kirk wanted to b0ne her bad - so how better to show a woman you love her than to get her a spot on “your” hit TV show – thus Kate Macdonald was born. Cr@ppy acting took on a new definition when she joined the show (note her illustrious career after GP – other than becoming a baby maker for “Captain Kirk”) and the show focused on their characters. Where did the other characters on the show go anyhow?


4) JEREMY MILLER

Now this guy got a bad wrap. “He grew up ugly”. This isn’t his fault. It’s in the genes, so you can’t blame the guy. Now I am NOT saying he grew up ugly or turned ugly. He just happened to be going through those very awkward teenage years just when the show was hot. Wrong place, wrong time. (Happened to most of us I would bet) Where as teenage girls on shows tend to be the hotties, most of the teenage guys tend to be awkward. That is the way nature works, the girls get cuter earlier, and the guys catch up in their 20’s usually. So everyone can lay off this guy. There are exceptions of course – notably Raven Symone who was cute as a kid, and now has turned b_tt-ugly and resembles Nell Carter more and more each day (size wise), and Tempest Bledsoe, who was also kind of cute as a kid, but as she grew up on Cosby, started looking more and more like Dennis Rodman by the time the show ended. Not feminine at all. I think she ended up as a linebacker somewhere. Now Keshia Knight Pulliam obviously did not strike every branch on the ugly tree on the way down as her costars. She missed it all together. She had a small awkward period, but turned into a real fox.


5) ASHLEY JOHNSON

Did they put this girl in a WIG, stick her finger in a light socket before each show, or what? Whew! Girl, what a fro! Nothing is uglier than a red-headed, walking Q-tip – and this was the girl. Generally, I think most people HATE these sniveling little kids anyhow. Now Ashley is a good actress, I have seen her in many things, but she was miscast in this role.

First she suffered from the ‘aging kid syndrome’. Mrs. Seaver has a baby, and the next year, this kid has aged 6 or 7 years. Wow! What was in that breast milk or formula? Miracle grow?

Second, she was also victim of the producer’s insatiable need to milk the cow for as long as they could. By this time, the writing was starting to REALLY $uck, the show was growing stale, and the skirts, errr, writers needed some “cute little kid” to spout off those funny one-liners, those innocent comments that only a kid can say, and try to minimize the damage Kirk was doing. As with so many other sitcoms – ‘babies’ are born in an attempt to bolster ratings and try to freshen a stale show – nothing more (same can be said for marriages, deaths, job promotions, etc). So although Ashley can act, she was just being used at the time.


6) LEONARDO DECRAPIO

The name alone almost says it all. Talk about a real ZERO addition to the show. Some successful doctor and his ‘perfect family’ is going to take in a ‘homeless’ kid? How believable is that? Apparently the state where the Seaver’s lived did not have a foster care system. Is this where the ultimate cheapskate ED SMART got his idea to hire some homeless bum and his wife to do work in his 6,000+ square foot house in Utah rather than pay some union wage to a contractor? Oh, mind if we kidnap your daughter (allegedly – I still say she went voluntarily) that is sharing a room with her 9 year old sister (what? 6,000+ sqft, and not an extra room Ed?)? Give me a break!

DeCrapio can’t act. At least he couldn’t then, nor in Titanic (“Jack” could have been played by anyone). Now I’ll give him SOME credit. In “Catch Me If You Can” he actually did a good job. But his so-called acting hasn’t gotten him very far as far as memorable roles. Most notably in his crockumentary trying to follow in Al Gore’s footsteps citing bogus science on the myth that is “Global Warming” (ask people in the Midwest where they just had the most snow in almost a decade if they believe in ‘global warming’). I give DeCrapio a slight pass, because he was younger, and he was being used by the producers of GP for the same reasons Ashley was. Not to mention they hoped he could help serve as a buffer to the buffoon that was Cameron, and of course Kirk thought it was Christian to take him in to the Seaver home, and that may be where DeCrapio’s character came from in the first place.


So take your pick. There were many, MANY places where this show jumped the shark. Growing Pains suffered from what SO MANY comedies did – they didn’t know when to call it a wrap and tried to stretch it a season or two too long. They should have went out while it was on top of the ratings, or close to it (i.e. “Friends”, “Seinfeld”, “MASH”, “Everybody Loves Raymond”, “Newhart”, etc)

You guys are being really rude with some of this stuff. Saying the guys were ugly and such and that why the show jumped the shark.
Although I do agree that Chrissy was a tad bit annoying, she brought a good element of love to the show. Do you remember the episode where she was scared of the dark and Ben comforted her? It showed how even a brother can be like a parental figure to a little sibling.
As for all of you thinking that Mike grew up and became responsible made the show jump the shark, i do agree with that. Viewers were used to seeing the young Mike Seaver, let me repeat, YOUNG Mike Seaver, getting into trouble. Hate to break it to you, but kids grow up. And more commonly than not, they get more responsible.

I think you guys are being really mean when you say Growing pains jumped the shark because Ben grew up to be ugly. Is that all that matters in a show? If the kid is a heartthrob? I think not. i almost think that making Ben a geek was a good thing, because it allowed viewers to see that not all tv families are perfect. No, he may not have grown up to be the world's sexiest man, but what have you seen him in lately?
He probably knows that the fanbase rejected him on the show, and how do you think that makes him feel? I personally liked Ben and Mike when they grew up.
Wasn't carol a geek in the first few seasons? Who eventually dated the football star in her school? Hmm, I think so.
And i don't know what's wrong at all with adding Leo. I thought he was a great addition to the cast! And look how successful he's been since!!
So, i think that the reason growing pains ended was because it ran it's time. After seven years, you can't expect mike to still be fifteen and a troublemaker or carol to still be that adorable brainiac in high school, or for Ben to be that cute little kid, the youngest of the siblings.
Mainly, growing pains ended because the characters got too old.
I think it is very disrespectful for someone to say that it ended due to their physical appearances.

I still love Growing Pains, and will continue to watch re-runs whenever I see them.

I LOVED this show as a kid! Never missed it - and I thought the characters Mike and Ben were HILARIOUS!

So for fun, I recently rented the first season to watch during my workouts.

Well.......by the third episode into it, I couldn't watch anymore, returned it and cancelled my future rentals of the remaining seasons. Alan Thicke was unbearable to watch as he tried to have an open and honest relationship with his kids. Yuck! Okay, I still thought Mike and Ben were funny, and I know that it probably got better in later seasons, but those few episodes I watched turned me off forever.

As an adult, Growing Pains is very painful to watch...

When GP did an episode where Ben wished his life was a sitcom. Than he runs into the audience while the producers are filming Meet the Seavers. He bumps into Kirk and Chelsea outside of their trailer
who use their real names on camera. The episode breaks the fourth wall better than any tv show episode I HAVE EVER SEEN.

Modern episodes of SNL could learn from this.

Chrissy's rapid aging did take away from the series - they've done the same thing several times in TV shows over the years. Bewitched did it 40 years ago, when baby Tabitha became a toddler overnight. Then again, Samantha WAS a witch. She was probably tired of watching poopy diapers fly around the room by themselves. But that was maybe a year's jump in age. Five years? That's too much.
GP had its moments. When Tracey Gold took a few weeks off to recover from her eating disorder, they had a show where Carol had gone away, and at the very end the words "Come Back Soon Carol!" (or something like that) appeared on the screen, and then "Carol" disappeared and was replaced with "Tracey". That, and the episode where a pre-Friends Matthew Perry dies. Watching Tracey absolutely fall apart when she finds out is moving.